On the train, I reread a book that was read almost twenty years ago. This book is the "Zen and the Art of the Motorcycle Maintenance" from Pirsig. I think, I took it from my bookshelves because I found a hundred year old edition of Walden.
Pirsig wrotes: "A flash and Ka-wham! of thunder, one right on top of the other. That shook me, and Chris has got his head against my back now. A few warning drops of rain -- at this speed they are like needles. A second flash...WHAM and everything brilliant -- and then in the brilliance of the next flash that farmhouse -- that windmill -- oh, my God, he's been here! -- throttle off -this is his road -- a fence and trees -- and the speed drops to seventy, then sixty, then fifty-five and I hold it there." If I remember well we never know from the book what happened in that farmhouse, what was milled in that windmill.
I have my own ghost just like this 'un-sci-en-ti-fic' vision in the novel. I have two son and the above mentioned 'foster-boy' who spend his thirty on Saturday. They are in my back. My first son, Martin is very similar to me. In his inner life, too. He always remind me where my ghosts live. In this kind of previous life, before my personality-eraser lightnings I had a friend, Feng. He's a cat. Now he's 19 and a half years old. I see him very rare, one time in two months. He recall my person, that I used to live with him. But now I am not the same. However, he don't mind it and try to call that person from his past. He start to singing in his cat's voice and says words that aren't cat's words.
